You Found Me
Profilectlx.Carlene Tan Li Xuan 11th July 1988. Currently 23+. Studied in St. Anthony's Canossian Primary and Secondary School, SRJC (first 3 months), TPJC, NUS FASS (econs). loves family, friends, chocs, western desserts, yellow, etc etc.
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Friday, February 26, 2010~ What makes you HAPPY and what would you GIVE UP for it? ~This question above is printed on a small blue piece of post-it and pasted on every one of our doors. It is actually a publicity effort by the hall production to raise awareness of KR's upcoming 30th anniversary hall production and we're suppose to pen our thoughts and they'll compile all these notes. So this morning, I decided to take some time and think about it. I'm not very good with words, but this is what I wrote, "To see my family and friends happy makes me really happy and I would give up just about everything so they would always remain happy." I wonder if this answer makes sense but I do hope that all you people reading this know that every time you all smile, it makes every inch of me feel very blessed and although I may not be the best kinda friend, but I'll always be here if you ever need. =) Well, enough said about me, what about you? What makes you happy and what would you give up for it? =) Monday, February 22, 2010=)It feels good when you've managed to clear some stuff off your mind. Haha... Anyways, Chingay has finally ended and I would like to thank everyone who went down to watch! THANK YOU for coming!!! =) Hope you all had fun! So, after Chingay ended, I was really craving for my green leaves (its a new year goodie from Glory) and green pea cookies... BUT... I went home only to find that they were ALL GONE!!!!! *sniffs* How I wish I could have flown to Katong immediately and head to Glory and get another 2 containers or something. Haha... Ah wells, guess I'll just have to wait till Saturday. Hopefully they still sell it!!! =X Now that Chingay is over, and aside from my other commitments, I really want to push myself into giving my studies top priority. I cannot fail this sem!! =( Well, gotta go! Take care everyone!!! Thursday, February 18, 2010~over him~I think.... I'm going to get over my crush sooner than I thought I would... =) I think... knowing the fact that it is and will always be a one-sided thing makes feelings a whole lot easier to fade and be transformed into another kind of feeling and I think I'm already on the road to achieving that! Well, I had always hoped that maybe one day I could be in line but I've come to realise, that's highly impossible. Like what my friend once said, if it was possible, or a mutual thing, it would have happened a long time ago. And I'm coming to accept it more now. =) Well, kudos to me! hahaha... Ah wells... =) Wednesday, February 17, 2010~ HAPPY CNY! ~I just read my dearest Celine's blog and I can't help but feel sooooo extremely happy for her! She sounds sooooo blissful and I'm really glad whatever happened happened. Haha... It was really worth the wait. =) WHEE!!! So anyways, its now the 4th day of the Lunar New Year and I'm back in hall attempting to study, which hasn't been very successful thus far. This CNY has been 4 days worth of non-stop eating, every since eve of CNY. Every MINUTE I've got something in my mouth. Can you imagine?!?! Gosh... Haha... Spent the whole 3 days of CNY with my family and I realised, I actually missed them quite a bit. Hardly had to spend time with them at all thus far with all my other commitments. And speaking of commitments, I just got myself into another I think... haha... It's something I've been wanting to do for the past 2 years in hall but was never given the chance, probably cause I didn't excel in the interviews, but now, I'm given another chance to take a shot at going, and despite all my other commitments, I've decided to try. I just hope I don't kill myself. =X Anyhow, time for me to get back to work. Don't know why, but I actually miss many of my friends back in hall, especially my besties. =X Take care everyone! Zhu da jia xing nian kuai le, shen ti jian kang, xin xiang shi cheng, wan shi ru yi, tian tian kai xin! =)        Sunday, February 14, 2010~CNY 2010~Once again, its Lunar New Year!!! The time to grow fat! haha... Tonight's reunion dinner was at a new restaurant just nearby Bedok 86, think the name was Chun Lee Restaurant or something like that. It's a teochew restaurant which basically meant all their dishes were cooked teochew style, and I must say, they're avid fans of parsley and celery. Haha... The food was pretty good! It was a pity I didn't manage to take any pictures of them at all! Well, it's time to list some CNY resolutions once again... 1) To really put in the effort to mug. 2) To be a more filial daughter, a kinder friend, and on the whole, a better person. 3) To persevere no matter how tough the going gets. General resolutions but I know they're bound to be of use along the way, especially this coming semester. Oh! And here's my new year wishes for all my dearest friends.... HAPPY LUNAR NEW YEAR!!! Xi wang da xia shi shi shun li, shen ti jian kang, wan shi ru yi, kai kai xin xin! =) And this is specially to my besties... Didn't know you all read my blog!! Miss you guys sooooooooo much!!! Hope we can meet up soon... Please take care and even though I may not be physically available, but I'll always be around to take your calls and listen to your problems k. Love ya'll!! Friday, February 12, 2010~ crush ~Crush by Mandy Moore You know everything that I'm afraid of You do everything I wish I did Everybody wants you, everybody loves you I know I should tell you how i feel I wish everyone would disappear Every time you call me, I'm too scared to be me And I'm too shy to say Ooh, I've got a crush on you I hope you feel the way that I do I get a rush When I'm with you Ooh, I've got a crush on you A crush on you You know, I'm the one that you can talk to And sometimes you tell me things that i don't want to know I just want to hold you And you say exactly how you feel about her And I wonder, could you ever think of me that way Ooh, I've got a crush on you I hope you feel the way that I do I get a rush When I'm with you Ooh, I've got a crush on you A crush on you Ooh, I wish I could tell somebody But there's no one to talk to, nobody knows I've got a crush on you A crush on you, I've got a crush You say everything that no one says But I feel everything that you're afraid to feel I will always want you, I will always love you I've got a crush... I've got a crush who thinks I've got a a crush on another guy. Haha... So, in other words, I've got 2 crushes? hahaha... So greedy right. The other one is more like an eye candy though... ah wells. And my crush... is just utterly impossible for anything to happen so maybe its time to change crush. Haha! Anyhow, this song is just stuck in my head so thought I'd just share! ^.^ Wednesday, February 10, 2010~ weird ~My bestie has always been crazy, and I think, she has just brought her insanity to a new level. Haha.. She has introduced me a new friend in hope that he'll recover faster and I, really hope I'll be of some help. haha. Anyways, my reason for blogging today is cause... there's this crazy thought going on in my head for some time and I have found no solution to it. And maybe, the only solution is to get out of here. Pardon me if I start to sound nonsensical but this post really can't get any more explicit. Haha... =) I don't know what I'm thinking, or why I'm feeling this way when I knew all along it was impossible. I don't know why I always have this shimmer of hope every time I decide that its over, that I should just wake up from my dreams. I just thought I could become your pillar if the need ever arise but I've come to realise, I'm actually nothing much to you. Not a very important someone, just a spare tyre when you need. This actually sounds very childish. Haha. I've been trying to pull away, but every time when I think I'm close to success, I just fall all over again. And what makes it worse is that I don't seem to mind, even though sometimes, it does hurt a little. BUT, after what I saw yesterday, I come to realise that I was wrong thinking you could have no one at your lowest moment. My hopes have all along been self-given. I know now, I can really put my foot down and just disappear, or at least, make you disappear from that place inside that "impossible" portion in my heart. I know I've gotta stop feeling like this if I don't want to lose this special friend. And somehow, I know I'll be strong enough this time. =) Sunday, February 07, 2010~ turn me over ~SOMEBODY SAVE ME!!! This semester has been hellish from day one. It has been so busy I've hardly had time to catch up with school work! And worst of all, I feel like I'm losing my humanity. Looking back, I was a know-nothing girl back in year one. Everyone was nice to me and I was nice.. or at least, I thought I was nice enough not to make many hate me. But now, I've become so bitchy I can't stand myself! I keep complaining and bitching about people. WHY????!!! I know for sure I'm starting to notice more things that I wouldn't have. I notice people's selfishness way more now. I'm starting to experience more of it and... I don't know how to react. I feel angry and can't seem to accept the fact that this is all just human nature. And I start to bitch. After I'm done bitching, I feel horrid. Like really guilty and mean. But bitching is like an outlet, an outlet for all those negative vibes I'm experiencing that are just making me go insane. I totally need to change. I really need to put a foot down and try to change myself. My brain needs to be scrubbed and refreshed and sprinkled with some "goodness" water. I'm going to make a chinese new year resolution now. I want to be a better person. A better daughter, friend and human being. And I will be. Friday, February 05, 2010曖昧曖昧讓人受盡委屈 找不到相愛的證據 何時該前進 何時該放棄 連擁抱都沒有勇氣 只能陪你到這裡 畢竟有些事不可以 超過了友情 還不到愛情 遠方就要下雨的風景 到底該不該哭泣 想太多是我還是你 我很不服氣 也開始懷疑 眼前的人 是不是同一個 真實的你 曖昧讓人受盡委屈 找不到相愛的證據 何時該前進 何時該放棄 連擁抱都沒有勇氣 曖昧讓人變得貪心 直到等待失去意義 無奈我和你 寫不出結局 放遺憾的美麗 停在這裡 Monday, February 01, 2010~ fairytale stories ~Some day my prince will come Some day we'll meet again And away to his castle we'll go To be happy forever I know Some day when spring is here We'll find our love anew And the birds will sing And wedding bells will ring Some day when my dreams come true. Sounds familiar? Do you recall this short song from Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs? How many of us still wish our Prince Charming would come and sweep us off our feet? I do! =) And seeing how my dearest Celine finally got her Prince Charming after one BIG LOOP, and having seen how my dearest Meiyi got together with Timothy back then just helped me regain faith that fairytales sometimes... just SOMETIMES... do come true. And I, shall hope that I fall into this "SOMETIMES". =) Well, why do I regard their stories as fairytale dreams come true? Cause both pairs went through so much together before realizing they were meant to be together. It was the kind of, everyone KNOWS they SHOULD be together BUT they insist on staying two separate entities cause they never believed they'd fall for each other. Haha... O.k, maybe not everyone will agree with me on their stories being fairytales but seeing both friends going through what they've been through to what they've become today was really heartening for me. And it definitely left my heart smiling for a really long time. =) Lucky - Jason Mraz Do you hear me, I'm talking to you Across the water across the deep blue ocean Under the open sky oh my, baby I'm trying Boy I hear you in my dreams I feel your whisper across the sea I keep you with me in my heart You make it easier when life gets hard I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend Lucky to have been where I have been Lucky to be coming home again Oooohhhhoohhhhohhooohhooohhooohoooh They don't know how long it takes Waiting for a love like this Every time we say goodbye I wish we had one more kiss I'll wait for you I promise you, I will I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend Lucky to have been where I have been Lucky to be coming home again I'm lucky we're in love in every way Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed Lucky to be coming home someday And so I'm sailing through the sea To an island where we'll meet You'll hear the music, fell the air I'll put a flower in your hair Though the breezes through trees Move so pretty you're all I see As the world keeps spinning round You hold me right here right now I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend Lucky to have been where I have been Lucky to be coming home again I'm lucky we're in love in every way Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed Lucky to be coming home someday Ooohh ooooh oooh oooh ooh ooh ooh ooh Ooooh ooooh oooh oooh ooh ooh ooh ooh Well, maybe I don't make any sense, but basically, I just want to say that fairytales do come true... so let's all keep a little faith. Going off soon, got a match later on. Not sure how it'll go but I'm going to try my best and I hope my team does so too. =) Take care all!! =) |